It’s that time of year, filled with Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanzaa and New Year celebrations. For many people, the holidays are an opportunity to come together with family and foster connections and belonging. However, for survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault, it can be a time of increased abuse, reliving traumatic past events, and not receiving the appropriate supports for safety.

But there are solutions that can help survivors feel supported. During a recent conversation with Teiahsha Bankhead, executive director of Restorative Justice for Oakland Youth (RJOY), I was reminded that restorative justice can offer safe options for families to come together in healthy ways, providing survivors with the healing that they deserve, while decreasing isolation.

Bankhead, who holds a PhD in social welfare, shared how restorative justice can include survivor safety and community accountability. One example that stood out was about a woman who was sexually abused by a family member who was set to be released from prison. Although happy that he was being released, she contacted RJOY because she wanted to ensure he wouldn’t cause additional harm. Even though he served time, she felt that the legal system had not helped her and her family heal or restore the relationship. However, RJOY community accountability and healing circles helped her feel supported and safe.

Restorative justice is an approach to justice that focuses on accountability and rehabilitation. It aims to repair the harm caused by a crime and to involve all stakeholders in the process. Restorative practices are often used in educational settings and may, at a survivor’s discretion, be appropriate in healing from domestic violence. 

As the holidays approach, the intersection of restorative justice and healing from gender-based violence is particularly important to me. As a queer Latina immigrant and a survivor of sexual and domestic violence, legal systems haven’t helped me. But through restorative justice, I’ve felt hopeful about opportunities for healing, practicing healthy relationships, and receiving deeper levels of support from family and community.

My personal experiences as a survivor, and the structural inequities I’ve faced, have led me to dedicate two decades to gender-based violence prevention and racial justice. My career has ranged from a community nonprofit to county-level policymaking and the criminal legal system. I’ve learned that prioritizing the needs of survivors, elevating their agency, and addressing the racial, economic and gender inequities they face are key to preventing violence. Because these elements are embedded in community accountability and transformative justice processes, these approaches to justice have become central to my work. That is why I’m excited about what we do at Blue Shield of California Foundation.

Law enforcement approach generates fear for some

At the Foundation, we support lasting and equitable solutions to end domestic violence. Our Break the Cycle of Domestic Violence strategy focuses on prevention, healing and the power of collaboration and partnerships. Based on 20 years of domestic violence research and field experience, we know that the fear generated by law enforcement contact causes many survivors to avoid reporting and seeking support for intimate partner violence.  

In fact, more than half of survivors of gender-based violence do not use the police, courts or the current shelter system. Often, they are fearful of being wrongfully accused and arrested themselves, losing financial support and stable housing, having children taken away, or even being killed or having their partner killed. When we only promote a law-enforcement response, we are missing opportunities to help more survivors and prevent future violence.

Creating connections

At Blue Shield of California Foundation, we started investing in additional options for survivors, particularly survivors of color, to find safety, healing and accountability. We are currently funding a learning community of organizations using restorative justice across California as a viable community-based option to help break cycles of domestic violence by centering survivor needs and building their support systems. Each organization brings varying perspectives, experiences and capabilities.

Some, like the East Los Angeles Women’s Center, have a long history of supporting domestic violence survivors. Others have deployed restorative justice in other fields, like RJOY, which has worked for nearly 20 years to disrupt cycles of violence and incarceration among at-risk youth. Deaf Hope provides statewide support to deaf and hard-of-hearing survivors of sexual abuse and intimate partner violence and their families. Community Justice Center and Success Stories employ restorative justice to empower incarcerated people and their loved ones throughout California.

Creating survivor-centered solutions for accountability

Bankhead explained that RJOY Conflict Circles are very intentional, require planning and great reserve on the part of the circle facilitator. A Conflict Circle requires participation from all sides of a matter: the victim, the harm doer, and representatives from the community that have been affected.

“The goal of a Conflict Circle is to arrive at a mutually beneficial outcome that addresses the harm the victim has suffered (and) explores what unmet needs might the perpetrator

have” that contributed to them causing harm, Bankhead said. “There is support for both of these parties.”

In the example that Bankhead shared, when the person who caused harm was released from prison, RJOY facilitated a Conflict Circle. Through the circle, the harm-doer agreed to be present when there is family contact. They also agreed to pay off the survivor’s student debt. Those are some of the things the survivor needed to feel safe and restored from the violent act that she survived.

As we approach the holidays, I truly believe that restorative justice should be among a mix of solutions to prevent domestic violence. Like in the RJOY example, restorative approaches can take many different paths, as long as it is directed by the survivor, not the police or other authorities. Restorative justice provides space and opportunity for survivors to separate the person who caused harm from their behavior. It avoids defining people by the worst things that they have done, while considering that harm-doers have the capacity to change. During the holiday season, when many of us want closeness with our families and loved ones, restorative justice can offer a way back to healthy, safe relationships.

Carolina Morales is a senior program officer at the Blue Shield of California Foundation, where she leads the organization’s programs to end domestic violence.